Children born after 1980 are well-versed in the use of electronic communications. They come equipped with cellphones. They use text messaging and instant messaging. They socialize in electronic communities. So it stands to reason that they bully each other electronically. And they do - 24/7.
The Forms of Electronic Intimidation
Internet Safety expert Nancy Willard of the Center for Safe and Responsible Use of the Internet lists seven types of cyberbullying in her presentation notes for Cyber-Safe Kids, Cyber-Savvy Teens, Cyber-Secure Schools. Some of these forms of intimidation such as flaming have been around since the Internet first began. Others such as harrasment and outing are older concepts which have been adapted for electronic use.
A Cyber World
We parents have always had difficulty understanding how and why our children socialize the way they do. Engaging in non-approved activities is something children have done probably since time immemorial. Unfortunately electronic activities are extremely difficult to monitor. Most children have access to a cellphone and the Internet. They send instant messages and emails constantly. They live in virtual communities such as MySpace. They blog and communicate via comments left on music and video sites such as YouTube. Thus, the opportunities for cyber bullying abound.
What's a parent to do? How on earth do we monitor those kinds of electronic activities?
We do what we have always done: we discuss the issues; we teach children to act responsibly; we exercise constant vigilance.
The worst thing we can do is to pretend that cyberbullying does not exist. Discuss it calmly and rationally with your children just as you do any other serious issue such as sex and spending. The earlier you have this discussion, the better prepared and equipped your child is for her first encounter with electronic intimidation.
What's a kid to do?
Being intimidated by one of your peers unleashes all sorts of conflicting and confusing reactions. You want to get back at the perpetrators because they have intimidated and embarrassed you. Yet you have been taught that two wrongs don't make a right. Read What would you do if it were you?
